A New Guide to What the Church Has Always Said About Sex

The day of his inauguration, President Donald Trump signed dozens of executive orders, including one that recognized only two sexes, male and female. And he reiterated that “there are only two genders” during his congressional address last week to a standing ovation by Republicans.

If the latter half of the 20th century was defined by the sexual revolution, then the first half of the 21st is defined by gender confusion. Our society is endlessly contesting the definitions of sex and gender, debating how many genders exist, and asking (or refusing to ask), So what is a woman?

Yet cultural revolutions often cause backlash—see Trump’s remarks, Americans’ increasing recognition that gender cannot differ from sex, and the growing impatience with gender ideology among conservatives. Sometimes, those opposing forces eventually settle into a new, stabilized cultural norm, as has arguably happened with same-sex marriage in the US and may be happening with girls’ sports. 

Part of the backlash to gender ideology has come not from Christians or political conservatives but from secular feminists arguing against hookup culture and, simultaneously, for acknowledgment of differences between the sexes. One is Louise Perry, a journalist and self-identified feminist who recognizes the harms the sexual revolution brought, especially to women, and sees disparities in the way sexual “freedom” has been experienced by men and women. 

Her latest book, A New Guide to Sex in the 21st Century, is aimed at young adult readers and is a condensed version of her controversial 2022 volume, The Case Against the Sexual Revolution. The earlier version garnered her attention in evangelical circles for affirming traditional norms

For a book aimed at Gen Z, the only thing more radical than arguing against hookup culture might be arguing for the reality of sex differences. Perry’s New Guide is certainly not abridged in its adult themes; she discusses sexual violence (her experience at a rape crisis center formed her passion on this subject), pornography, and hookup culture in explicit terms. 

But more shocking for many of Perry’s Gen Z readers might be her unashamed case for sex difference: “Once we recognize men and women are different, many other things follow,” she writes. Her reliance on evolutionary psychology is key to the whole book—she marshals evidence that men are more prone than women to commit rape, most women don’t enjoy violent sex, women are less likely to offer casual sex, and reliance on pornography distracts men from real relationships.

Perry attributes the ill effects of the sexual revolution to opposing evolutionary interests between men and women. How, she wonders, can we best promote the well-being of both sexes despite these differing interests? “Somewhere between sexual liberalism and traditionalism, it has to be possible to find another way,” she writes.

She’s a pragmatist in that quest and concludes by offering concrete advice, mostly to women: Avoid men who are sexually aggressive. Don’t get drunk in public. Listen to your moral instincts. Assess whether a man would make a good father before sleeping with him. Consider the stability of monogamous marriage. Despite her desire for some third way, much of Perry’s advice is simply traditional prudence and ethics. In fact, much of it is a diluted version of traditionally Christian guidance. In any case, Perry knows it’s not groundbreaking. 

What’s more novel for younger generations, especially Gen Z women, is her larger message: Recognize the differing interests between men and women and especially the vulnerability of women. Perry’s gender stereotyping isn’t entirely helpful, but it acknowledges the elimination of difference—the reality-rejecting conglomeration of gender ideology—that is increasingly accepted in Western culture.

That acknowledgement for that audience would have been made markedly more radical had Perry embraced the Christianity she has praised and engaged. The church’s teaching on sex difference and chastity will always be radical, and it has new relevance as long-standing cultural norms continue to lose their power to restrain. 

What does it mean to be a woman—or a man? Without biblical guidance, rightful rejection of gender ideology can go awry, landing us with unbiblical extremes of “trad wife” passivity and violent masculinity. Orthodox biblical teaching and real examples of faithful men and women in the church can help younger generations imagine a better way. 

But if we’re honest, evangelicals sometimes struggle to do this well. We can and should celebrate the return of young men to churches, but young women are disappearing from the pews. Superficially gendered responses, like Christian man camps and wine and paint nights, while well intended, are a distraction from real spiritual formation around learning how to be a good brother or sister in the faith or a better father or daughter or husband.

Complementarian churches, which champion differing roles for men and women, too often overemphasize the negatives (Women can’t) rather than publicly embracing and celebrating the unique giftings and callings of each sex. In the worst cases, these congregations have handled sexual abuse poorly, responding in ways that undermine their testimony about God’s good will for men and women.

Churches with an egalitarian point of view, on the other hand, face other risks. They too often minimize the historic, biological, and biblical reality of sex differences. Rushing to insist that women may be called to ministry and other kinds of leadership is sometimes paired with inattention to why we God gave us these particular bodies or why women are more vulnerable to sexual violence. 

For Christians of any conviction, the question is whether we truly understand sex difference. Beyond stereotypes and Perry’s evolutionary psychology, beyond ladies’ crafting nights and men’s campfires, do we have a biblical understanding of how God created us and how we can celebrate and disciple both men and women as members of the body of Christ? 

To compellingly articulate this difference to a world that wants to know what it is to be a man or a woman, we must first understand what Scripture says: that we are all formed in the image of God (Gen. 1:27) and that, in Christ, there is no disparity between the sexes (Gal. 3:28). In his wisdom, God created male and female, both reflecting God’s image in the bodies we inhabit. 

In a world that wants to erase this difference, the church must better understand and confidently articulate the beauty of God’s created order, male and female alike. It is perhaps the most valuable gift we can offer the next generation.

Kara Bettis Carvalho is ideas editor at Christianity Today.

The post A New Guide to What the Church Has Always Said About Sex appeared first on Christianity Today.

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