Only a generation ago, Norman Rockwell’s 1959 painting “Sunday Morning” was a prophetic diagnosis for pastors everywhere. The mother takes the kids to church while the father stays home, presumably engaging in unimportant things. As they leave, the son’s gaze is on his father’s example, learning that church is for women and children. Times have changed—the vibes have shifted, and it is now young women who feel that church is for men.
What is happening with the young women?
I’ve had a dozen or so people ask me this in the past few months. Two graphs, one from The Guardian and The Financial Times, are particularly jarring. Especially in contrast with Rockwell’s painting. Historically, men have identified as more conservative than women, but the gap is growing, with a significant uptick starting around 2012.
For Gen Z, this gap extends beyond politics and into the spheres of religion and sexuality. In America, Gen Z is the only generation in which women outnumber the men in disaffiliating with religion, defying both historical and global norms. A higher percentage of Gen Z women identify as feminists than any other age cohort, and 30 percent of Gen Z women identify as LGBTQ. These trends are so atypical and severe that some called 2024 “The Year of the Global Gender Rift.”
Pastors who want to evangelize and disciple both men and women (as they ought), must understand the factors behind this trend and chart a course to navigate these new waters in ministry. If “religion” codes “right” (or “based” as the internet sloganeers say), then there are plausibility structures and obstacles that must be overcome.
Let’s consider four key factors: abortion, atomization, abuse, and algorithms.
Abortion
A majority of women (63 percent) and 45 percent of men identify as pro-choice. “Abortion is healthcare,” the argument goes. Who’s against healthcare? Do you want women to be sick? “My body, my choice” is the libertarian refrain that sometimes is applied to vaccines and sometimes to abortion; both have to do with the government setting medical policy.
Significant confusion lies in the differences in how people understand and use the word abortion. Sometimes it is used to describe a woman getting a D&C after a miscarriage, and sometimes miscarriage itself is termed “natural abortion.” In other cases, non-viable ectopic pregnancies threaten the life of the mother. In these situations, “abortion is healthcare” is a true statement that evangelicals don’t oppose a priori.
When trying to reach people, it is crucial to understand their concerns and validate them where possible. We who believe that humans are God’s image from conception must be able to speak with nuance about these matters of public policy and not let our pro-life activism be perceived as brutality or ignorance about real healthcare situations women face. For example, if a guest from your church arrives and says something like, “Jesus is interesting to me, but Christians being against a women’s right to choose is a huge turnoff,” instead of responding, “Too bad, so sad,” we ought to lean in. “That is interesting. How did that come to be a value for you?” She’ll likely discuss the terror of unplanned pregnancy, rape, incest, or health situations that risk the life of the mother. We can acknowledge the terror of some of those circumstances and the evil of others. We should also discuss the church’s role in supporting women in the midst of overwhelmingly difficult situations, and commitment to protecting their dignity. Because women are made in God’s image, God values each woman’s life and hates any and all assault brought against her.
At the same time, we must be willing to push back: Two wrongs don’t make a right. Most abortions are not about healthcare. In reality, the overwhelming majority of abortions occur because having a child would interfere with personal goals, such as education, work, finances, or caring for existing children. This represents a profound departure from the Christian call to self-sacrifice and protection of vulnerable lives—a value that has set believers apart since the early church. Put more bluntly, it is murder—tantamount to Molech worship, where children are offered up as sacrifices for personal or familial gain. Throughout history, God’s people have been the counter culture, distinguished by their willingness to place the needs of the defenseless above personal convenience or gain.Evangelism involves both affirming and confronting, and that is certainly true on the issue of abortion.
Atomization
Atomization uproots individuals from their social context, web of relationships, and their creator’s design. Radical individualism combined with consumerism has led people to conceive of their lives as personal brands to be curated and designed. God cannot have plans for me that I do not have for myself. The Author of History having a “design” is him having an imposition; authority, including God’s, is derived “from the consent of the governed.” Children, in this context, are not considered blessings but rather obstacles and interferences.
Evangelicals can acknowledge that children by definition “interrupt and disrupt” women’s bodies more than men’s bodies. There is a disproportionate cost. This isn’t because of “the patriarchy” but rather a result of God’s design for biology.
Feminism has pros and cons. Pro: women are less likely to be trapped in abusive marriages than they were a few generations ago. Con: maternity is perceived as an assault on the atomized woman, with the fetus being seen as a parasite that either receives consent or doesn’t from its host. A person who understands society to be a collection of consenting individuals rather than a web of households, families, and communities will inevitably see the created order as a wet blanket of duty rather than a delightful design.
Abuse
The timing of the #metoo and #churchtoo movements coincides with the spike in females identifying as liberal. Abuse of power is a significant issue to the weaker sex, as mentioned in 1 Peter 3:7. Although both men and women can be victims and perpetrators of abuse, the disproportionate number of men in positions of authority means that abuse of power is often skewed disproportionately toward the harming of women. How many abusers need to be protected by churches before it’s reasonable for women to conclude that the nature of the institution itself is the issue?
You don’t have to be convinced by every allegation of abuse to recognize that the broader pattern is, at absolute minimum, a liability for the church’s reputation and witness. In conjunction with that context, we’d be foolish to not see how a president who appeared on the cover of Playboy magazine—an inherently abusive and dehumanizing cultural artifact—doesn’t contribute to the lack of trust young women might have in conservative circles.
While pastors may be tempted to form opinions about every alleged abuse scandal that makes the news, doing so would largely be a waste of time. What is more important when it comes to reaching young women is having a coherent theology and philosophy of abuse, a public accountability structure within their churches, and a plan for how to handle cases of abuse within the congregation.
A pastor who is ignorant of or uninterested in power dynamics within households and institutions fails to follow the incarnational path of Jesus. Pastors must ask themselves several questions: Do we have a clear protocol for handling allegations of abuse? Have we sought training from experts in this area? Are we fostering a culture where victims feel safe coming forward? Being pro-life, from both a biblical and public perspective, requires truly caring for the most vulnerable people—often females—in our congregations and communities.
If you aren’t sure where to begin, read Leslie Vernick, read Darby Strickland, learn from Chris Moles, familiarize yourself with the Duluth model. Get your leaders and elders trained, collaborate with local therapists, and, above all, don’t overestimate your competency when it comes to matters of abuse.
Algorithms
The digital age has created a new reality in which we’re exposed both to a higher degree of exposure to stories of suffering and to tribalistic in-group/out-group social pressures. This dynamic has been harder on women than it has been on men.
In Jonathan Haidt’s book The Righteous Mind, he identifies six “moral taste buds” that shape how people engage in moral reasoning: compassion, liberty, fairness, loyalty, authority, and sanctity. Of those six categories, the one most strongly associated with someone identifying as liberal is compassion, and a close second is fairness. The significance of com-passion—literally suffering with—coding as liberal is significant as the feminine and maternal affections sparked by higher levels of oxytocin present in women naturally facilitate a higher degree of emotional connection to other persons.
The algorithms know this and will literally capitalize on those with a generally more empathic nature. While men in general are more likely to have their anger weaponized by the algorithms, women in general, being more attuned to group dynamics, are more susceptible to the social pressures brought about by digital technology. Social media preys on this dynamic, with algorithms that monetize our desires and affections being more interested in co-opting your soul and weaponizing what could be holy rather than making the world a better place. Churches must help young women develop an emotional life that is shaped by the Scriptures.
Dismissing compassion as feminine is anti-Christ—Jesus himself sees the crowds and is “moved with compassion” many times in the Gospels. Women’s inclination toward compassion is a gift that should inspire men. The church must demonstrate the emotional healthiness and helpfulness of Jesus to those they are trying to reach.
I don’t think it’s a coincidence that the rise in young women identifying as liberal perfectly correlates with the age of the smartphone. Exposure to more stories, decentralized mechanisms that amplify voices of sufferers, and the ability for tribal dynamics to develop digitally is all new, and compassion-oriented young women without fully developed prefrontal cortices are the most susceptible to the social pressure this reality creates. Haidt’s more recent work, The Anxious Generation, documents this phenomenon extensively.
Pastors who want to minister in this environment must have a thoroughly worked-out and nuanced understanding of what the Bible says about anxiety and how to function with health in a digital world. We are called to embody Christ’s selfless compassion, which stands in stark contrast to the commercialized compassion that pervades our digital landscape.
The Burden of Proof
Every shift in culture brings both assets and liabilities for evangelism. While men being more interested in the church is good news, women’s increased skepticism must be answered. The Great Commission is not a gendered task!
At a minimum, women identifying as less religious and more liberal places the burden of proof on religious conservatives to demonstrate that their worldview is good, true, and beautiful for women, not just for their male peers. As with any missionary endeavor, this is multi-faceted: we must give careful consideration to issues related to abortion, be healthily compassionate people who patiently help others rightly order their affections, discipline abusers and support the abused, and think critically and clearly about buzzwords and cultural movements like feminism. Stomping our feet about how young women are skewing liberal and anti-church is not a viable missionary strategy. Pastors need to develop the necessary competencies and repent where necessary to be faithful shepherds.
Ultimately, we know that every worldview or ideology that isn’t submitted to the lordship of Jesus isn’t good for people. Evangelism is rooted in our love of individual persons and our desire for them to live according to their wonderfully created design. But good intentions and fervorous prayers are not enough; thoughtful contextualization has everything to do with following the incarnate God Most High.
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